The Keep

The Keep
No, I don’t need to see your face.
I sit alone in this cramped space
where dampened stars glaze darkest night
and wonder why on earth this place
won’t ransom me from my sad plight.            
 
I glanced you in my hunter’s sight.                                                                                                     
Through tear wrought nights, fair years rolled on             
but, still, I dwelled in Limbo’s keep:                           
I wondered where I might have gone                          
had I not been so deep, asleep.
I chose to stay ‘til night birthed dawn.
 
My waking up stalled much too long
and lingered well beyond its need
and though my heart yearned to be freed                                                        
and though my heart heard your faint voice
I had no choice and stayed my course:
some echo-pains do not recede.
 
I fear I never could endorse
‘the walking game’ so many play:
I knew I would not walk away
so fragile was the carver’s heart
with no way out, I had to stay.
Through restless storms I pitched and spun
and nearly could not launch my quest.
My lonely heartstrings stretched and frayed
dared not staunch life’s flow ~ cruel unrest.
Delayed: my life’s heart beat, undone.
 
I think I must have Loved you best.
But, bitter bite of winter’s chill
froze Love’s emotions long constrained.
I knew to move from that grave room
where little of my heart remained.
 
Through shivered fog would distant fields await?
How might I choose the one which suits my fate?
I made so many ill-turns on this chase.
How will I know which long road to embrace?
 
If you call out to me and I to you
and if our songs, alone, might see us through
I promise I will run along this trail.
The trail, which leads to you: I will not fail.
For you, alone, have won my trembling heart.
For you, alone, will match my stalwart heart.
I can’t resist the Love within your heart.
And, so, I persist to you my Love.  YOU.
 
For Peter McKinnon on Valentine’s Day, 2021 by Barbara Helvey Hughes